Pincushion Hill Montessori School
Toileting: The Montessori Way
Alison Petersen • Jan 23, 2024

The toilet learning process for young children takes time but doesn't have to feel daunting. Here are some key aspects of toileting the Montessori way.

As parents we quickly learn that children have control over three things: eating, sleeping and toileting. Rather than engage in power struggles, however, we can help children develop the skills they need to manage and gain mastery over these essential aspects of life .


In Montessori learning communities, young children learn how to prepare snack, fall asleep with assistance, and dress themselves. In addition, they learn how to control their sphincter and stay dry. This process, which we call "toilet learning" or "toilet awareness" takes time, yet it is a vital part of becoming independent.


Because we are helping children with an important aspect of their independence, we try to avoid the terminology "toilet training." After all, we aren't training our children like we might train a dog! Rather we are helping children feel the success of becoming fully independent as they become masters of their own functions.


The process takes time but doesn't have to feel daunting. Here are some key aspects of toileting the Montessori way.


Establish Body Awareness


Toilet awareness starts at birth. From the earliest day of life, we talk to our infants about what is happening as we change their diapers. We might say "Your diaper is wet from urine," or "I am wiping your poop off your bottom."


To help our infants become aware of being wet or soiled, it's best to use cloth diapers. Disposable diapers are very effective and wicking away moisture, which leads to children not connecting the act of eliminating pee with the feeling of being wet. As children shift into toddlerhood, they can begin to wear cloth underwear.


Useful phrases:

  • "Does your diaper feel wet or dry? Is there poop in your diaper?"
  • "Your underpants feel so heavy! You must have had a lot of pee come out."


Collaborate


When a child is wet, we help them to the bathroom and collaborate with changing out of their wet underwear. We allow them to sit on hte toilet to see if any urine is left that can be pushed or released into the toilet. Then once they have on dry underwear, they return to their activity.


Children need to be involved in the toileting and changing process. They can assist in getting the clean underwear or diaper and putting any soiled items in their appropriate place. This gives children the feeling of some power or control in what is happening.


Useful phrases:

  • "You can hold your shirt up while I pull down your pants."
  • "You can open the Velcro on this side of your diaper and I'll open the Velcro on that side."
  • "I'll have a turn to wipe your bottom and then you can have a turn."


No Tricks or Treats


We offer the toilet, but we never force children to sit on the toilet. We also avoid asking children if they would like to sit on the toilet. There is a happy middle in which we suggest that they sit on the toilet or let them know it is time to sit on the toilet. Ultimately, we trust that children will incorporate this part of daily life into their routine. Young children love the consistency of routines, so we ensure, from the very beginning, that toileting is a regular part of the day .


Bribing, reward charts and punishments may have short-term results, but do not work for the long-term goal of helping children develop independence, self-assurance, and mastery of this essential part of their humanity. We allow children the time to be successful. Rather than scolding or over-congratulation, we know that children will learn through experience and feel proud of their accomplishments.


Useful phrases:

  • "It's time to sit on the toilet."
  • "You peed in the toilet. You did it all by yourself."


Respect the Process


Often when adults change children it is all done so quickly that children aren't aware of their bodily functions. Rather than rushing, we take time to explain what is happening and offer opportunities for collaboration.


It's showing the utmost respect to children when we help them learn how to do something for themselves. When children able to respond to their body's needs, they are one step to closer to being fully functioning, independent young people.



Montessori preschool classroom
By Alison Petersen 26 Apr, 2024
Many families rely on childcare while their children are young. Figuring out the best place to drop your little one off every day is a big decision. Parents want to ensure their child spends their days safe, comfortable, and happy, and under the watchful eye of well-trained and competent adults. Daycare is the obvious choice for many folks…that is, until they become aware of other options. If you’re reading this article, it’s likely you are one of those parents who is trying to figure out the best possible placement for your child. Allow us to highlight five key differences between a typical daycare center and a Montessori school. An Emphasis on Education Montessori goes beyond the reaches of a typical daycare facility. While daycares focus on watching and caring for children, Montessori schools do this and more by creating an environment focused on children’s learning. We believe education starts at birth. Children’s days should be filled with play, as that is how they learn, but we create space for them to play in ways that enrich their development. We don’t fill our classroom with whatever toys look fun; we carefully prepare an environment with materials that have been developed after careful scientific observation and used for over 100 successful years. These materials are still games and toys from the perspective of the child, but they tend to have much different effects on them from a learning perspective. A Natural Environment Most daycare environments are filled with bright colors, plastic toys, and maybe even a cartoon character or two. Montessori environments eschew any type of commercialism or characters. They utilize natural materials like wood, plant fibers, and even glass. Natural tones are favored over bright and loud colors, and soft and natural lighting is evident. Montessori classrooms intentionally bring the natural world inside, with plants, found objects, and pets. Children are directly involved with the care of living things in the classroom. Montessori Trained Educators The training of a Montessori educator goes far beyond the training of a typical daycare worker. To care for young children, both must meet certain requirements such as first aid training, passing a background check, and some knowledge of working with children. Montessori educators, however, continue far beyond the basics. Most have college degrees, with many obtaining advanced degrees. They have completed rigorous Montessori credential training, which includes comprehensive instruction on child development, intensive lessons to help them present Montessori materials correctly, work in Montessori philosophy, and so much more. We encourage you to ask your local daycare facility about their teacher training requirements and compare them to Montessori requirements while you explore your options. A Sense of Community When your child is enrolled at a Montessori school, it’s so much more than a place to drop them off each morning. The whole family is welcomed as a part of the school community, and special events and traditions work to solidify this sense of community. Montessori parents are often eager to connect with one another; we all seem to have a sense that a strong community contributes greatly to the wellbeing of our children. It’s helpful to have other parents to ask questions, hear about experiences, and even socialize with. Montessori schools are also unique in that we welcome parents into the classroom. In fact, we encourage regular observation. The children are used to adults sitting quietly in a corner of the room, so the practice is unobtrusive, and really gives adults a clear picture of the type of work we do. Many parents walk away from observations in awe of the engagement of the children and the depth of the work/play they show. Interested in seeing a Montessori classroom in action? Call us to set up an appointment today. We welcome you to observe the uniqueness of Montessori.
Family spending time together outside
By Alison Petersen 19 Apr, 2024
We live in a digital world with screens at our fingertips every minute of the day. Children are growing up in a society where technology is at its most advanced and improving at a rapid pace. Technology is part of our daily life, whether we like it or not. The Montessori Method was founded over 100 years ago before technology was developed. Dr. Maria Montessori observed children in their natural environment and was a strong advocate for young children moving. Through movement they learn not only about their surroundings but also about their own bodies capabilities. Through observations Dr. Maria Montessori noted: “When there is motor and physical activity, you can see a more important kind of education, a kind of education that takes the force of life into account… If we do not take [this] into account, we miss the best part of education.” – Maria Montessori So even though Montessori does not advocate for screen time, how do we apply it today living in a digital world where screens are all around us and children are becoming more immersed? Set An Example This is, without a doubt, the best and easiest way to motivate your children to play independently or get outside. Children mirror what they see more than they pay attention to what you’re telling them to do. That means, if they see you binge-watching your favorite shows, they’re going to take cues from you. In as much as watching your weekly shows may be your way of defusing, try not to watch them with your children around at least – this helps you set a good example that they can follow. Spend Time Outside Find moments to bring your own daily life outdoors. Spring is a great time to move family dinners to the patio. On a weekend afternoon, plan a picnic in the backyard. A picnic doesn’t have to be an exhaustive affair, either. Simply ask the children to set the table on a blanket on the grass rather than the dining table. Encourage Independent Play It is likely that screen time comes into play when you need a few minute to get something done, or just some time to recalibrate. What if there was a way to achieve this without encouraging more screen time? You'll be happy to know there is, and it's called independent play. Promoting independence is a key component of Montessori, in a large part, because it allows the children to feel respected, capable and content. One of the best ways to encourage independence is through play. If children feel comfortable and confident playing on their own, they will also feel capable of completing other tasks on their own. Implement A Routine Some parents find it beneficial to encourage independent play daily at the same time. You can choose to do this just before or after nap time with toddlers, or just after breakfast with slightly older children. Encourage the children to play outside after dinner. A routine that works for your family is the best routine to implement and adhere to. Children will quickly learn the routine and look forward to indepdent play and spending time outside.
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